Fight, Flight, Freeze: Emotional Intelligence, Behavioral Science, Systems Theory & Leadership

I’ve read Gil’s book a number of times and have used the principles in the book, taught in the Tough Stuff training process, for nearly 20 years now. Gil’s book provides practical insights into increasing your emotional intelligence (EQ) and how to improve communications and with those you lead and love. I’ve shared this book with numerous colleagues over the years and recommend you reading if you strive to improve your effectiveness as a leader.

In full disclosure I am a colleague of Gil Crosby’s as an Associate with Crosby & Associates.None the less the review I have written is a real assessment of this book, I reviewed it as recent as 2013 to use in my work with Crosby & Associates and it was a terrific refresher.Fight Flight Freeze is the most readable and practical books I have seen on the subject of learning and applying conflict management theory and doing skill development i.e. managing interpersonal differences.I first learned of this method and theory in my graduate studies and thought I had found the key to success. That was nearly 30 years ago. Gil’s book, written many years after my graduate studies, is a wonderful compilation of conflict management theory and I often use it as a review or refresher for myself and in my work.Gil is skilled in writing this in a straight forward manner with practical exercises that I think will help anyone, willing to do some self examination, improve their ability to manage differences in personal life and in work relationships, really any relationships. When I discovered conflict/ or differences are an inevitable part of life doors opened for me. Relief came as I understood conflict is neither right nor wrong; it simply is a fact of life and how to manage it is the secret.My relationships improved with family members, over the many years in my work settings often co-workers express appreciation and acknowledgment of the contributions I make in facing differences. I must give credit to understanding conflict and utilizing the basic skills Mr. Crosby offers in this readable handbook, and in practicing/utilizing them and reminding myself by reviewing them that I can no longer say “I am the kind of person who does not like conflict”. I find this book offers theory, tools and practical application to be successful in all settings where there are differences i.e. life.I highly recommend this little book with big application for success.

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