Heavy: An American Memoir

Without a doubt, one of the best books that I have read in the past year. The book defintitely earned it’s title–it is very heavy. But it also open, honesty, frantic—and quite honestly–there were times that I had to put the book down. I’m appreciative that Laymon was able to share his story.

Heavy is a must-read. Kiese Laymon’s honest take on Mississippi makes an important statement for our times.

Kiese Laymon details the way we treat our bodies in the face of trauma. As Southern black men, beaten by poverty, we must contend with the fact that we are not broken, but eternally bent and strive toward being better.

HEAVY holds the tension between the world of ideals and the world of reality through his relationship with his mother, his body, and the predominantly white education system he finds himself in. The narrator’s gaze is unflinching at himself and those around him, all the while holding all of us, broken, where we bend. A gorgeous and devastating read.

This is a powerful book that takes you on a vivid emotional journey of a young man’s quest to know and understand what love is. I highly recommend this book to anyone who would like to increase their emotional intelligence.

This is truth and a walk worth taking. I’m glad I read this book. Lets work to forgive and heal our self of the wounds we have and secrets we carry.

This is easily one of the most compelling memoirs I’ve ever read. I could not put it down. An important book every American should read especially in the wake of the Antwon Rose II tragedy and miscarriage of justice.

This gem was a story I tore through with its raw account of the black experience. A must read for anyone who considers themselves anti racist. Truly…abundant.

I read this entire book in two sittings. It was that compelling. Kiese Laymon did something amazing here. I loved it loved it loved it. Black abundance! And such trenchant analysis of some of our nation’s dirtiest secrets and the role violence plays across the board in keeping secrets secrets.

Amazing book! Highly recommend the audio book as well read by the author. The book is written as almost a letter to his mother. The book is about their relationship and the abuse he suffered from her throughout his life. It also discusses his lifelong struggle with his weight. From his struggle with gaining weight to his eating disorder as the acceptance. Love this book!

Book came right on time! Already finished it. Loved it! If you know of a black boy especially, this book, malcolm x autobiography, the fire next time and between the world and me are books to be bought for them.

I was so moved by this work, this voice. Thank you Kiese Laymon for giving us this gift. This is a most important time for us so be listening to your voice, as we (the white world) have yet to grapple with what we have done to you, and to all African Americans since the founding of this nation. And yet, here you are. What a blessing…

My powers of language are completely inadequate to describe the nuance, insight, and gut punch power of this memoir. I want to say that it is deeply vulnerable, too, but this is a book that questions and reimagines the meanings of vulnerability and for that reason, paradoxically (or not), I can’t make that claim, but I can say that I will never think about vulnerability — and so many other things — the same way again.

This book needed to be written and ut needs to be read. Simply brilliant.

The other reviewers are far more articulate in their recommendation of this work than I am, so I will not inadequately repeat what has already been said. Laymon’s book is beautifully crafted and nuanced. He balances societal responsibility and individual moral agency and shows how both manifest in our choices and actions. This book has made a material impact on how I view the world, and I recommend it to everyone.

I find Heavy riveting, heartbreaking, and something that makes me angry.Mr. Laymon writes to his mother and it is both riveting and heartbreaking to see the journey that this relationship takes.It makes me angry to once again see evidence that not only do I reap the many benefits of white privilege, but to also see, once again, all the ways that the US is stacked against anyone who is not white – and how the country ignores this.

Finished Heavy moments ago. I heard Kiese Laymon on NPR, and the second I heard he was from Mississippi, I pulled over and ordered, not only Heavy, but all of his books. I am so glad I was listening to NPR last week because I NEEDED this book in my life. As a Mississippian who left after college but whose family (including mom) still treads water in the state, this book gave voice to the pain, the struggles, the cycles of violence and desperation and waning hopelessness that influence just about every decision made by people in Mississippi. Many times I have been asked to describe the psychology of Mississippi and its people, but I could never explain it. Mr. Laymon captures that psychology and he paints literary pictures that are so real and so emotional that many times I had to take a break and remind myself to breathe because this book takes your breath away.The way in which he wrote this book to his mother, and started from his early childhood forward, created a crescendo of emotions. My heart rate increased as I moved along his life, and I kept thinking, “Oh no, something terrible will happen.” Only to get to the end and realize the “something terrible” was the metamorphosis of the relationships between the characters — Laymon and his mom, Laymon and his grandmother, Laymon and his body, which ingenuously is a prominent character of his memoir. There are so many layers to this memoir, and rarely do I read a book in two days only to sit down to read it again. Not only am I going to re-read this book, but I am going to have my husband, son and daughter read this book as they often ask about Mississippi and its influence on me as a woman, mom, etc.Poignant, personal, heavy. Deals with issues that are not fun but that are too common in so many of our lives and Laymon recounts these serious events and experiences honestly and yet respectfully (positive there is a better way to describe it). Who would I recommend read this book? Moms, sons, daughters and dads, people who deal with body issues, broken people, hurt people, the people who love broken and hurt people, anyone who wants more insight into the sustaining impact of racism, oppression, and America’s unwillingness to confront the past in truth and frankness. Outstanding book.

I highly recommend this book. Laymon is making so many important moves here and I love the way it’s written. I could say so many things, but I’ll just say, do yourself a favor and get this book!

This book evokes the same feelings, rage, trepidation, anger and a myriad of other unfathomable emotions that appeared as I read, The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin. The difference: his location is placed in the Mississippi versus Baldwin’s Harlem.

This book is honest. It could have been my son writing We all try so hard in our parent child relationships and feel like failures in our endeavors. How do we shape each other over the years ? I recommend this to anyone who has a child.

Only 5% of memoirs should have been published, the other 95 coming from writers so bereft of a story idea their existence had to suffice. The 5% are justified by one of two reasons – 4.5% are the memoirs of historically significant lives and the other half percent – the tiniest slice – are worth reading because the author is so brilliant sharing his life exposes our own, amuses, rattles, teaches and creates a community of the reader, the writer, and everyone in between even if – ESPECIALLY IF – they seemed to have nothing in common. Kiese Laymon is such an author.

Such a great read and so many nuggets of wisdom. The author takes you on a journey of his life in such a way that you don’t want to put the book down! From the realtionship of his mother to the bond of his grandma. He is courageous to share his story and I hope this encrouages others to heal as they share their story.

And that’s not a bad thing.This book, for book club reading is one of the most endearing and yet hardest books that I’ve read, ever!Eager to read more of this writer.

Heavy: An American Memoir, by Kiese. Laymon (Scribner, 2018) is a complexly layered book. On its face it is the memories of a man who began his life as a poor child in Mississippi and how his experiences accumulated to make him the man, the author and the professor he is today. It is a journey in search of authentic love, authentic connections, authentic grasp of self in spite of the cultural and historic forces that would deprive him of all three.It is a brutal story. It is a tender story.A memoir is by definition a recounting of events the author lived through. It is told from the perspective of the author. In all human stories there are other people involved, other points of view, other memories of the same events seen through other eyes. Precisely because it is a memoir, a telling of the author’s experience, it must be taken seriously. In Laymon’s case I think it especially important to listen carefully and respect his voice, for it is the voice of one man who is part of a subset of Americans who are seldom taken seriously, seldom listened to carefully, seldom taken into account in the national conversation. Voices like Kiese Laymon are often dismissed, belittled, ignored.Some readers will be appalled at some of the experiences Laymon recounts. Others may dismiss events as exaggerated or from the past, things that wold not take place today. Others will read some parts of the book and walk away smug in their belief that Blacks are the architects of fractured Black families; there is nothing here that remotely supports such a reading of life in America—Black or white.Throughout the book Laymon is speaking to his mother, telling her his becoming. His experience is that none of the significant people in his life tell the truth about things that matter most deeply. (I intentionally am not providing any examples from the book: I don’t know how to give examples here without taking away from the power of Laymon’s voice. I encourage—nay, urge—you to engage him unfiltered through a reviewer.) He openly struggles with understanding and telling the truth. His struggle is one with which anyone who has successfully transitioned from adolescence to adulthood can identify.I said earlier that this Memoir is a layered book. It is easy to see it as one man’s story. It is easy to begin to identify ones self in this story. It is less easy to see this story as an engagement of one man with main stream America. Somewhere in the last third of the book it dawned on me that the story can be read from the perspective that the author’s mother represents American culture, that she is a stand in for the ways the culture did and did not nurture him. There are no good words to describe how we are nurtured/formed, given a hand up or kicked down in American life by the systemic way the culture works. I know that American culture nurtured me differently from Keise Laymon simply because I come from an educated, privileged white family and Keise Laymon is a descendant of enslaved people. Even acquiring an education was more difficult for him than for me by an order of magnitude. The difficulty is the result of institutionalized white male supremacy fallacies, and privilege. It has nothing to do with any Black innate shortcoming. Race is a social construct; it has no basis in biology. If you doubt that assertion or are uncomfortable with it, then I urge you to read the scientific literature that is the basis for that statement. (Google “the biological basis of race” and read the first half dozen hits that come up. For starters.)Finally, the author has written a love letter to America. He is inviting all of us—privileged and ”other” (See Toni Morrison’s (The Origin of Other, Harvard University Press, 2017) to engage in a conversation about our shared 400 year history.And he invites a conversation about our shared future. This is a most timely, urgent conversation. Who are we? What kind of a people do we want to be? What choices can we make that will strengthen our chances of leaving a livable future for our children and grandchildren. What choices will foul the Eagles nest?I urge you to read this book during this holiday season, at least once, and to write your reactions to his Memoir and share it with someone important to you. Laymon is a voice to take seriously.November 23, 2018

As a white an in his 50’s, I can only say that I love how this man expresses himself. In fact, I would love to break bread with him. His courage and raw honesty are inspiring…

Its not easy being this honest about oneself and their journey through life. Kiese does this with a deft pen, a unique style and a boldly creative approach. From one writer to another…very well done!

Kiese Laymon is A skillful and lyrical writer, open and vulnerable about the injuries done to his family by the culture and to him by both his family and the culture. It is a moving book. Although he has plenty of criticism about white people, it is a book that left me, a white person, with a great deal of understanding untainted by defensiveness, A testament to Laymon’s brilliance as a writer. He’s funny too!

Mr. Laymon, thank you for this. It has opened my eyes to an America I love and hate. I could not put this book down!

#Heavy# opens with an account of witnessing a girl be raped repeatedly by Kiese’s peers. Thereafter, Kiese’s account of this assault should be required reading for all sexual assault counselors. Namely, his account of how this traumatized girl convinces herself compulsively how she somehow consented to this scenario is simply mesmerizing. That is narratve writing to perfect pitch. Perfect pitch is indeed present in every line.of this gripping memoir. Then after this confusing bruising all enveloping trauma, which leaves Kiese completely numbed, he returns home. His home offer absolutely no solace whatsoevwr. Rather his mother (a single formerly teenage mother) whose rigid views of how he will thrive in a racist state where every black man is a target is dehumanizing and vicious. While Kiese speaks openly about the ways he himselr became abusive, the environment he grew up in was brutal,, mired in double binds and always suffused in layers of denial. Even his grandmother who worked a chicken line during the day, then did endless humiliating side jobs, lived submerged in denial and of course.relentless.fear.and.anxiety. Growing up on this diet of fear, denial and violence is of course a sure receipe.for mass incaceration, violence and most of all addiction. Sure enough Kiese is submerged in addiction, shame and most of all learned helplessness. This is a prized primer on the roots of addiction, family dysfunction, overwhelming trauma and most of all deep entrenched denial that transcended generations.Somehow out of this wasteland of daily violence, neglect and ultimately devastatng confusion, Kiese has fashioned a powerful narrative that transforms shame, neglect and overwhelming cumulative trauma suffocating and effectively destroying his entire community. Kiese indeed credits his mother with his extraordinary ability to write and revisefiguratively about the most impossible traumatic experiences. Nevertheless the capability to be honest, reflective and truly illuminating is attributable to Kiese alone.This book is a masterpiece putting Kiese in the ranks of William Styron and very few others..His work will undoubtedly see new levels of success in the future but meanwhile his memoir of surviving violence neglect and dehumanizing poverty and racism is transformative, transfixing (on every oage), and above all an incredible triumph over absolutely impossible odds.A

We read this book for my philosophy class at Johns Hopkins and I could not put it down. Incredibly powerful book written very eloquently. People of all backgrounds should give this a read for it can benefit us all.

Never have I understood what it is like to be black particularly in the South. But this is a beginning. I will need to read this several times. It will change you. I also suggest seeing Keise’s interview on the website…not a bitter young man that you would expect. He obviously refuses to be held captive by hatred of those and a society that have wronged him and so many others!

This book is good. It’s one of those that leaves you in physical pain from the heartbreak but you love every page. This memoir tells the life from a black son to a black mother and it’s gorgeous. He ties in abuse and violence to his weight and how American violence reacts to black bodies. It wasn’t what I thought it would be when I picked it up but I’m glad because it was so much more. Every word had meaning.

This is a must read for anyone interested in getting to know or better understand African American culture.

This warning is because I bought this book new from Amazon. However, the pages were folded over as though someonr previously read it and there were stains on the back of the book.Not to mention there was a new sticker on it like it was from a college book store.I also could not give this book less than five stars because it is everything. It should be mandatory reading.

Kiese Laymon couldn’t have chosen a better title; this was, indeed, hefty. Although we do not share a similar upbringing or life experience, I felt the torment, laughed at humorous dialogue, and connected with the cultural references used to frame time and space. Laymon struggles to free himself from the emotional baggage that was created from years of tenuous or abusive relationships, addiction, and an unhealthy self-image. This work is his catharsis, his endeavor to alleviate the agony, his pursuit of the answers. Laymon, who writes this memoir to his mother, does so with unclouded memory and brutal honesty.

HEAVY is several things: a memoir, an author’s letter of confession to his mother, and a story of both mourning and hope. Especially compelling is how the term “heavy” takes on a multitude of meanings over and above the idea of physical weight; Laymon demonstrates how his title becomes an extended metaphor for the lies we tell one another and the exacting toll we suffer as a result, individually and collectively. Laymon’s writing style is direct and honest, and his organization is skillful as well as aesthetically pleasing. Highly recommended.

This book is an absolute gut punch.I listened to this book back in 2018 when it first came out and this time I read it so I could underline and highlight favorite parts. You can’t go wrong with either option.Kiese Laymon is just an incredible writer. He has this superhuman talent and strength that allows him to get to the innermost, squishy-vulnerable, unflattering, oftentimes-shameful parts of himself and others. Reading this again feels as raw and beautiful as it did 4 years ago.I also know that this book wasn’t written for me. As a white woman, I have immense privilege and I see (and read) everything through that lens. No matter what gender, race, orientation, etc that you identify with, this is an important and powerful book to read.In this book he reckons with his family’s demons when it comes to food, love, secrets, intellect, gambling, identity, and so much more. From the very first page he acknowledges that he wanted to write a lie that everyone would have loved, but he wrote this instead. This book is HONEST.I wish I had more eloquent words to describe Heavy, but with a book like this, you just have to tell folks to read it and let the book speak for itself.

One of the best books I’ve ever read. So much of it is relative to me. I heard about it on NPR. I saw Tommy Tomlinson tweet that it wore him out. I just blogged today about family dysfunction.The author kept me wanting to read more. I’m a slow reader but devoured the 2nd half of the book today. It’s a well written book that will make you feel the author’s pain and after you cry, you’ll just say wow.This has got to make the Oprah book of the month.

One of the truly great memoirs I have ever read. Visceral and unsparing, in every way I conceptualize both terms. I’m in awe and I’ll be thinking about this book for a long time to come.

If you have time to read just one book this week, make it “Heavy”. The authenticity and bravery of Kiese Laymon, as well as his deeply engaging writing, shines through on every single page. This is a book you don’t want to put down until you finish it, and will keep thinking about long after you do finish it. I wish I could send a copy to every Black and White person in the USA.